June 2013

Already?!?

Why, it's practically Christmas!  

Now don't pfft pfft me...you'll hear that from me 6 more times until you KNOW it's Christmas!  

I'm late.  It's not like me, I know!  I lost track of time and didn't notice it was June already!  The year is half gone!

I'm nursing an unidentifiable back injury that is preventing me from doing any exercise.  The doctor told me not a single activity that can stress my back and extremities is allowed.  Not even easy walking.  So I went for an easy walk the other day and after half a kilometer or so, my left leg started to ping.  I can already see it... the doctor explaining to me what the MD after his name means and why I should listen to him.  He looks vaguely familiar.  I think I might have had an affair with him when we were still in school.  He did tell me we were the same age while discussing my injury with a generous smattering of "at your age" and I remember a guy with the same surname.  What are the chances? LOL!  He doesn't remember me too!!!  More importantly, he doesn't know what's wrong with me!

Yesterday, I felt an alien feeling.  UTTER DISAPPOINTMENT.  Yes, I've been disappointed before but never did I feel as utterly disappointed as yesterday.  I have never truly appreciated this odd sounding word until then, UTTER.  I felt each and every letter like darts... no, power attacks!... to my solar plexus.  Thank God that's only 5 letters! Except it's followed by that 14-letter word!  I felt like I got hit by double multi-colored candies!  CRUSHED!!!  My unreal world went dark.  I realized just how vulnerable and utterly defenseless I allowed myself to be.  It demolished all the practical processes that I established and implemented all throughout my unremarkable, ordinary life.   Meaning I am stupid.  So much so that I wanted to tear up my birth certificate!  But it's too late, baby, yeah, it's too late.  I suppose it's what normal people do... get utterly disappointed once in a while.

I'm glad I'm utterly normal.