Why, it's practically the end of the world!
A guy I frequently liaised with dropped dead a couple of weeks ago. It was so sudden. He simply dropped dead. I viewed his remains to say goodbye. He had a smile on his face. He seemed at peace. Way to go, Gary!
My own world almost ended last Thursday. As I slid into a tight spot to the left of a taxi at the head of the lane and stared at the traffic light waiting for the other side's yellow light so I can turn left, it went through my mind that someone might beat the red light and hit me if I went about my usual millisecond-into-the-green-light zoom-zoom-zoom take off. There was a wall to my left high enough to block my view of the perpendicular street so I could get broadsided if someone did. I idled... and true enough an SUV went zooming by even when we had the green light. I could have died that night if I weren't in a languid Norah Jones mood. Was that one life gone? How many more left?
What if I did die that night? What would happen? Kayla will be OK. She'll be taken care of by my friends and she'll find good homes for my dogs. What about my beloved? He will be consumed with sorrow. He will miss me for a long time but his family will help him heal. The thought of him painfully remembering me whenever he went to the places we went to (except our private place!!!) or did stuff that we did together (except s**!!!) or heard a song that I liked brought tears to my eyes. How sad!
Even sadder is if he died. I will be broken. I will always wait for the good morning text. I will always wait for the morning call. I will always wait for the smileys and the amishoos (Hah! No arabias!) sent to me throughout the day. I will always check my rear view mirror if he's there protecting my back until we part ways. I will always wait for the good night text. I will always miss his smile. I will always miss how he looks at me. I will always miss his corny jokes. I will always miss his laugh. I will always miss his kisses. I will always miss his embrace. I will always miss nestling in his arms. I will always miss him. With no way to heal, that part of me will be dead. There will be no music in my life. There will be no light.
Always.
Forever.
Clearly, I MUST die first.
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